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D i r e c t o r y

The Danger of Prioritizing Littles

I was visiting one of my Grandfather's when he was still alive in a nurse care home many years ago,

I was with my father and family who were also visiting. With us, was a care nurse who was responsible for caring for Grandpa.

We were in a room with a piano, snacks, and activities. The room allowed people to get together in the home and sit down together. The room was for visitors or patients that were from the care home.

There were tables, people standing, people sitting, and people talking in the room.

While standing talking to my father, the nurse starting harassing my father and I.. for we hadn't yet pulled in a chair and sat down. It seemed odd to us that she would start bullying us for not sitting down? What was wrong with standing?

"Why don't you sit down? do you have a problem with sitting down or do you like standing?" the nurse said (or something along those lines).

"Why can't you guys sit down?"

She didn't just ask us politely if we wanted a chair.. she actually made a point of arguing why we were not sitting down. Normal people sat down she thought.. and if we didn't sit down, what the heck were we up to in our little minds? Our evil little minds.. gee.

Maybe because life is too short to be worrying about whether or not we want to sit down or stand? Maybe because I sit on my ass all day at a computer and prefer to stand whenever I get a chance?

Maybe because I wanted a clear site of the piano, in case I wanted to walk over and play it for grandpa in a few minutes? Maybe because grandpa could not get up and fetch tea and cookies, and I wanted to stand beside him with my hand on his shoulder serving him whatever he wished for?

Maybe because there were plenty of other people in the room who were both sitting and standing talking? Maybe because we hadn't decided yet whether we wanted to go over and get some food before sitting down?

Maybe because we had sat down all day long in the car and were sick and tired of sitting down?

Here we were, in this room of old people who were in their 90's about to die, and the nurse was bitching, moaning, and complaining about how my father and I were not sitting down. Normal people sit down! Why don't you sit down? Can't you just sit down for a moment?

How could someone worry about such things.. when she was taking care of people who were dying pretty much daily in that home? How could one focus so much attention on such nil issues in life such as.. are we sitting down at this moment or standing?

Instead of prioritizing such minor issues in life.. such as whether those two people are sitting down or standing, we should instead be concerned about other more important things.

Does grandpa care whether we sit down or stand while visiting with him? Grandpa is dead now. And I never did play the piano for him in that room, because I was too busy thinking about what an idiot this nurse was.. bringing up such issues and making such ludicrous assumptions about our state of sitting or standing. She assumed that people in a room with tables had to sit down.. and that anyone who didn't immediately sit down was up to something fishy.

What I should have done, was told the nurse to leave us alone with grandpa - so that I could just be myself. She was getting paid by the hour to be in that room with us too. I should have literally told her to fuck off, and go away. But I was too polite, so I just took her nonsensical complaining, ignored it, and didn't say anything.

Is grandpa sitting, laying down, or standing?

It doesn't matter: Grandpa is dead.

I'll leave you a song from The Doors

Someday soon, someday soon
Familiar freaks will fill your living room
Rugs lash out with their lizard tongues, you're not getting young
You're not getting young

And I hate to remind you but you're going to die
All by yourself in the infancy's lie
Someday soon, someday soon
Television bleeding like a harvest moon
Flush the scissors down the hole, you're getting old
You're getting old

And I hate to remind you but you're going to die
And you're going to be needing all of your lies
You'll be all alone when the animal's cry
All by yourself in the infancy's lie
Someday soon, someday soon
Someday soon, someday soon 

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